Ahok

There are always those sad days. When life burned into ruptures.

Today was one of them. When you started morning with the disappointment, deep deep agony. It was like you lose hope of everything. It was a day when you stop believing in anything, not in democracy or post-democracy or whatever it is.

It was an exam. I did a lot of bullshit around many things: land tenure, biopower, politic of ontology, post-democracy, post-development, and bla bla.

But, there was one phrase which never failed to catch me every time: disavowal of antagonism. That we are, basically, created through antagonism, difference. It is through antagonism that we shape and reshape ourselves. We disavow antagonism too often, meaning we disavow the chance for egalitarianism too often.

It is what always happens, right? We have been trying too hard to become same, to become equal, but we will have never been. We are antagonistic. But, not in negative way. It is just the way things are. And we disavow it for so many times. Thus, we fail to grasp the essence. We believe we practice democracy well, but we are not.

Fuck everything.

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